Against All Odds

I'm trapped.

Bounded on my hands and knees.

The mountains too high,

Can't you see?

You'd think I'd do anything,

To be free.

*Wrong*

I don't like where I am

But that's where he put me.

You'd think there's nothing left to do,

Than go to the rhythm ofmy life's song.

*Wrong*

I've got faith the size

Of a mustard seed,

More like a speck of dust.

But I'm willing to keep believing,

If it be your will.

My heart beats, For you to use me one day.

You put me here.

Where I am.

So I can do your will.

With my last breath,
On this Earth. I'll thank you.

And I know for a fact,

That that's not wrong.....

 Because you help me

Against all odds

Criss-Cross

One.

*Sigh*

Two;

Breath finally released.

Perfect criss-crosses;

Blood dripping on my feet.

I'm feeling kinda woozy

At least I'm feeling no pain

Well,

Maybe a little faint.

Crazy me.

What have I done?!

Drip to drop.

Drop to drip.

What havve I done?!

What is it?

there is something I cannot remeber.

Why I felt the need to do this?

To release pain,

By making it?

Everytime I do this,

I risk an infection,

Justto feel,

A woozy perfection.

I feel like a failure.

So very useless.

But I refuse to fail this time.

Washing away the woozy blood perfume,

Leaving only behind,

The pink criss-crosses,

On my skin.

Apocolypse

What's gonna stop me?

Who's gonna know,

About my daily horror filled life?

Am I only dying on the inside?
I am not normal,
Because they kick me,
And kill me,

And I always live.

What message is God sending here?

Or is it Lucifer?

Does he want my rebellious soul?

To fight with at the Apocolypse?

"What's gonna stop you?
"Who's gonna know?"

That demented voice whispers in my head.

Drowning it out,

I pretend to be dead.

"Lifeless,

Useless,

Good 4 nothing"

That voice whispers.

I would scream 'Go to hell'

But you rule over it already.

Don't try to rule me too.

"If God is really alive,

Why is he making you suffer?"

I wouldn't give spit,

To put out the fire,

That surrounds you.

What will stop you?

Who will know?

I would know.
And,

My concience would kill me.

No one will rule me,

I am free!

Pain

Pain,

Black as Africa.
Pain,

Like being stoned.
It hurts so much.
Something ain't right.

Not right at all.
The pain I feel from hatred.
Pain,

From being betrayed.

They like my pain.
Weather they know it or not.
It doesn't matter.
But what I know is...
I'm gonna make it stop.
They need to treat me

With respect.
I'm not a paper girl.
Best know that from now.
I know what's real

And what's not.
You cross me.
Karma'll cross back.
And once and for all,
You'll

Feel

My

Pain